what is the difference of a bag of dead babies and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline

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Why should you never shower with a pokemon? Pokemon is a game for children. In doing so you would greatly disturb your child who is quite fond of pokemon

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Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

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No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

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Why didn't the boomerang return? It hit a baby

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So there was this cracker sitting on a bench. A pigeon picked it up and flew off. Probably ate it afterwards.

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Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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whats worse than 10 babies nailed to a tree? one baby nailed to ten trees.

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A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

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did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off? he's all right now

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Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

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Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

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Why do jews have large noses? Genetics.

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-Whats this? -Anti-Jokes.. -Theyre not funny

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You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

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Roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, oh shit my gardens on fire!!!

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a man walks into a bar with a poodle stuffed halfway up his rectum... WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR A PUNCHLINE!? MY GOD! THIS MAN HAS A DOG UP HIS ANUS!

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why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

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why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

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A man stops another man on the street in Manhattan and asks "How do I get to Carnegie Hall ?" The other man gives him direction, including which subway stop to get off at.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

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Who does creatine? James Cornish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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