What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

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i had a black friend once......just kidding

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Wha'ts the difference between Justin Beiber and a piece of hot muff garbage? Fart triscuits.

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The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

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CUT MY SOUL INTO PIECES MY NAME IS VOLDEMORT TERMINATION YOU'RE BLEEDING DON'T GIVE A F**K IF I HAVE NO NOSE FOR BREATHING

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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What happens when a black man is swinging in a tree? He is enjoying the swing set I helped his father put up.

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What's blue and smells like sky? Sky

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Whats Brown, Long and is on every black man? Legs

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A black man and a white man get married... Trick question, since gay marriage is illegal in the United States, the men did not get married, and they later both died alone.

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So A duck wants to be a musician. Day1: He cuts of his beak attempting to sing. Day2: Dead

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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What is the difference of The United States and 10 pounds of shit? Well,considering there are 50 united states,we would take 10 away from 50 for a total of 40. A very simple subtraction problem indeed.

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Why are you on this sight? You're procrastinating. I am too

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Here's a joke for you, my life...

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What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

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You know what they say about fat thumbs? They give a lot of accidental comment likes on statuses.

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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Why was the Jimmy Sad? Because he had Autism.

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whats short blonde and speaks spanish? my spanish teacher Mrs. Inman

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Two guys walk into a bar. But the third one was a duck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops