Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was convicted of murder and rape

They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

What do you call a black man in church? Religious

What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

Doctor Doctor! I think im turning into a carrot! Thats a side effect of the drugs Alice, We've just had your test results back. I'm sorry Alice, You've got HIV.

How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

how many dirty stinkin apes does it take to put in a lightbulb? 3 dirty stinkin apes, 1 dirty stinkin ape to put in the lightbulb and 2 dirty stinkin apes to throw feces at each other

What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Knock Knock.

what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

Knock knock. Who's there? No one, because your house burned down.

Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

How do you choke a lawyer? You squeeze his neck until he stops breathing.

Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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