Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

What's red and smells like metal? A tricycle. It's covered in blood.

Have you ever watched that show on Lifetime about that woman?

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

How high is the sky? True or False

A seal walks into a club, It proceeds to maul customers and then makes its way back to the ocean where it lives.

Under Chuck Norris' beard, there is a chin.

A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

What has 3 eyes, green fur and blue ears? Nothing.

Faithful men.

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A) The color of their hair.

Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

What is Blue, Pink, and Green, and sometimes sparkles when wet? Grass. I lied about the Blue and Pink to throw you off...because I can.

What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

How did the hot blonde get a promotion from her boss? She worked really hard and achieved more thaan her coworkers.

A boy walked in on his mom and dad in their bedroom last night they were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

What did grandma get little Benjamin for Christmas? Nothing, she died last year

What do you call two blacks on a bike? Two good friends having a good time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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