There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Why did the teacher ask her student about the test? Because she was in the hospital the day of the test because her husband was hit by a rail road spike and died but she was so devoted to her job she wanted to know.

One man calls emergency: - Come immediately, my little son has swallowed a condom! After five minutes, the same man calls back: - It is OK, I found another one.

A baby crawls into a bar. He cannot walk.

You can't choose your family, so choose someone else's.

What happened when the boy got caught with his hand in the cookie jar? He gets shot in the face by Santa.

Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

What did the snowman say to the other snowman? Do you smell carrots?

What's worse than Bogans? Boat people.

WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. sama bin laden, is coming for you.

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of it's legs.

A man walks to a bar and sees a very hot blonde sitting across the room. Turns out it was actually a blonde man and they both had a wonderful night because they were both homosexual.

Looking's for free... Touching's for free.

A man walks to a baseball game what does he see? Many people

Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

An Anthony eats a juicy pickle.

Why is 13 the most hated number? 13 is Jewish.

What's worse than the holocaust? Two holocausts.

A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

You- I came up with a new word! Friend- What is it? You- Plagiarism.

What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

I am black. And i will beat your children. At checkers. They can be the red .

What do you do when you see a black man with half a head? Stop laughing and reload

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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