What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

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Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

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Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

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For no reason at all Pac-man was being chased by evil monsters while eating his luch...He choked on his food and died

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This is a stupid joke. Get it to the top of the list and Kobe Bryant will pass to you.

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so....a guy is sitting on the couch looking out his living room window and a cab pulls up and honks..he says to himself, "wow that was quick, i just called for the cab 5 minutes ago!"

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What are the biggest ants in the world? Ants under a magnifying glass.

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What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, oceans don't have hands to wave either

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Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

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Did you hear about the new XBOX releasing in Mexico. It's called the XBOX JUAN!!!

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What do you call a puppy with all it's legs missing? Franklin, the quadraplegic puppy.

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Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

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T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 1: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 2: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 3: Come in.

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what's funny about war? nothing!

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Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

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Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

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How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

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why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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