A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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How do you double any amount of cash? Stack it up and fold it in half.

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What did one alligator say to the other alligator? Ear

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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roses are red violets are blue i done your mom and i do you too

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No soup for you!

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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Knock knock Whos there? Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

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You know what they say about a man's feet... No i don't.

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what do you call a redneck virgin? a seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

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what did jake say to the priest? hmmm, salty

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How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

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joe galasso from plainview ny

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A black man walks into a house and is shot because it is not his house and it is 2 in the morning.

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What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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knock knock

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why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

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What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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