I'm at a payphone. Though I'm out of change so I'm unable to call my girlfriend and break up with her.

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Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

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What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

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What do you call Madeline McCann at the bottom of the sea? Drowned Madeline McCann.

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A storm be brewin!

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Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

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what's the worst part about owning a prius? telling your parents you're gay

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Knock knock Who’s there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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Insert joke that isn't even an anti joke = The new jokes on anti joke now.

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What do you give a gay guy on his birthday? a invition to strait camp

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Once upon a time, in a magical kingdom, there were too many similar jokes on anti-joke.com. One man thought he could be funny by writing a joke that referenced this, and be even funnier by referencing what he was referencing. Then he referenced that, then that, and so on until the layers of meta caused his brain to explode. Some of it landed in your mother's vagina.

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A man walks into a bar. Ow

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

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Why does Shelby Like Pandora? Because she prefers rap and hip hop music and Pandora helps select songs for her to listen to according to her interests.

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What is the difference between a horse? All the legs are of same length, especially the back ones.

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yo mamma so fat she should probably look into a clinical weight loss program and exercise daily.

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Q: How do Hellen Keller's parents punish her? A: They give her a timeout

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what is the difference between oral and anal? anal makes your day and anal makes your whole weak

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Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

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what happened to the frog that had a car accident, nothing it's dead

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If you know someone with the last name Schmidt. ALWAYS ask him to take a Schmidt on your chest

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Three men walk into a bar. One of them is not planning to consume alcohol because they are responsible and he is the designated driver.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops