How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

What is better than winning a gold medal at the parolympic games? Having two legs!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding poo in your shoe.

-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

If you go to a restaurant and you have more food on your plate then someone who is obese, you KNOW you have too much food.

copy me and i will kill you

Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

a horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "why the long face?". the horse answers..."i'm a horse"

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but the real question is why there are two flies having sex inside a light bulb.

Your momma is so black that she probably has ancestors indigenous to Africa.

what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

What's bigger than a moose? An even bigger moose.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

Q: There is an Elf King, King Kong, and Godzilla all on the empire state building. Which one jumps first? A: None, because none of them exist.

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead of getting hit by the plane because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and ever since he was 8 years old he has wanted to die with his body completely attached.

Why did the monkey ride a bike? Because he was taken from his natural environment, abused for years and forced to ride a bike.

knock, knock who's there you yoohoo i don't like chocolate milk!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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