Why was the cat unable to drink its milk? He was stapled to the wall

2 Scientists walk into a bar. The first one asks for H20, and the second one asks for H20 too. They both enjoy a refreshing glass of water.

If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

roses are red violents are blue your dad is gay soon it all be you !

So a baby seal walks into a club...

Why did the man cross the street? Because he had to go work.

You know whats funny? Women's rights

do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

Why did the old lady walk across the road? She was on her way to the convenience store on the other side.

how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

1500 Jews were ordered to walk a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten Jew flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --Amon Goeth

What begins with "B" and ends with "N" that you never want to call your neighbor? a Black Person

What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

Josh Groban, John Mayer, Ben Folds and Nick Cave are at an underground club that specialises in lithuanian folk music and siberian vodka. end of story

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

What's funnier than 24? Many things, the number 24 is not very humorous.

Why did the boy have glass in his mouth? Because he was chewing on glass.

How does a black guy in debt make money fast at the bank? He applies for a loan and conscientiously works hard to pay off the loan in turn, which he was lucky enough to get at a low interest rate.

Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

What's the difference between a smashed watermelon and a dead black person? One is a minor slip of the hands and the other is a fatal accident involving a human being.

Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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