A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't know any better. It very recently was decapitated in order tofeed the farmers family.

An old man walks into a bar. It was, a metal cylinder, not unlike a short carbon rod, and not the drinking establishment he normally frequents, named O'Malley's Pub and Eatery, which was, in fact, next to the the building with the protruding metal bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

Once opon a time there was a black America He name was Bob

The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

how does bob marley like his doughnuts? Sugared

Why did the bear eat a group of children? It was hungry.

What do you call a jewish womans boobs? JUBES!

Why did an asian lawyer commit suicide? Because his wife left him and he hated his miserable life.

a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8 knifed 10.

A mother is sitting with her son at the park. A nearby man suddenly breaks into uncontrollable coughing. The mother leans over to her son and whispers, 'Smoker's cough.' The son never takes up smoking.

how do goldfishes drown? you pull them backward water fills there lung and there die

what's the worst way to fall asleep? sad. it makes you lose sleep.

The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

Q. What is the difference between an ass kisser and a brown noser? A. Depth Perception.

Yo mama soooooo dumb! You should really take her to a doctor, she might actually suffer from mental retardation, I'm just concerned about her.

How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

no.

hi hi stop! no yes no no stop no grr lol i will get you back not if i fool grrrrrrr BOOM BOOMBOTH:GRRR BOOM BOOM lol lol both:grrrr THE END BY STICK SMOKER

How do you make asian ice cream you mix it with a textbook

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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