Why did the young boy cross the road? because his dad beats him due to alcoholism and his mother is a crack whore.

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Knock knock whose there alzheimers alzheimers who get in the van

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Why did Steve Jobs step down as CEO of Apple? Because he died.

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How many dead guys does it take to build a shed? None. The contractor did it for 40 dollars an hour using maple wood.

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What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How do you kill a blonde? You stab her many times in the ear with a fork......Then finsih her off with a spoon. No knives those hurts

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Q: If your riding down the Nile on a boat and your boat springs a leak, how many boxes of pancake mix does it take to fix the hole? A: 58, because Koalas are marsupials

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid with two stump arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

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A baby seal walks into a bar... The bartender looks at it and says: too young.

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A man named Jake walks into a bar. The bartender says hi jake... The End

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Q: Why did the man die of starvation??? A: He didn't eat for 3 days!!

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When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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what do you call a bunch of black people in a pool cocoa puffs

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hey justin

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Why was the boy sad? He was harassed by his mum who died in the 1800's and went into a depressive state in which he drove himself to death using a pair of pliers and a rechargeable battery. No, he really just stubbed his toe.

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What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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Why did the man give money to the Jew? Why would a man give money to a Jew?

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What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

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There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

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You're a big fat monkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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