A black man, a mexican man, and a caucasian man, walk into a bar with handguns. The three break out into a gun fight and everyone is killed in the cross-fire

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the fish say when he hit the wall? A. Dam B. He Charlie I found the wall C. Both Well he didn't say both but he could have said A or B but it wouldn't make sense for him to say both.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the blind man get hit by a bus? Because his seeing-eye dog was distracted by a squirrel and ran off, leaving the man in the middle of the cross-walk in heavy traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's tall, has a really long neck, and eats leaves? My tall vegan neighbor's giraffe

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock knock. Who's there? Silence. Silence who? No, I meant there was silence, I didn't really say anything. Oh, OK. But seriously, who's there?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was Mr. Smith always so sad at the block party? His uncle molested him as a child, when he was 10 he finally told his mother. His mother and father later fought if they should tell the police, the mother wanted him to go to jail, and the dad didn't want to ruin his family because the uncle was his brother, and the uncle had children. Right before his mother would call the police his father stabbed her in the back, mr smith saw what happened. Him and his father hid his mothers body and mr smith"s dad told him if he tells anyone about this he will kill him. Years later when mr smith was 13 he went on drugs to ease the pain, he later became an addict, and dropped out of school. He know suffers from depression and has killed all 3 of his wives. He is wanted in many middle eastern countries. So when ever he goes to sleep he has the same dream were him mom offers him pot and right before he gets it his dad stabs her in the back. So know mr smith is sad at the block party because he will kill himself later tonight.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he needed to go home.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? What do you mean what's the difference?!?! One of them is a fucking elephant!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's white and can't climb trees? A fridge

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the homeless man's sign say? It didn't say anything. You had to read it.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

two peanuts were walking down the street. but one was unsalted...

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q :Whats the difference between a truck load of bowling balls and a truck load of dead babies? A: I don't have a truck of bowling balls.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats the difference between a black guy and Luke Skywalker? Luke met his real father

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats a six letter name for black people? Friend.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was 2 afraid of three Because it bigger

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A: Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's faster than the speed of light? Not a car

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what is the differnce between my truck and chuck norris? i eat my own poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops