Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

The boy gets shot in the face, he then dies of childhood obesity.

A man goes to a gas station to pump gas in his car. After about 7 minutes, he leaves.

What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

all these jokes are horrible now

My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

why are you going to laugh at this its reallly dumb

why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask him to lower the volume a bit and maybe also play a quieter tune.

Haiku's are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigorator

Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies.

What has 2 legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog

Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

Yo momma so pretty,she gets a lot of compliments.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks " What'll You Have" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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