In Soviet Russia, man doesn't walk to the bar. The bar walks to the man!

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Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

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What did the foreigners do to pass time? They blew up the twin towers.

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learn. advance!

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why was the girl eating a pie , because she were hungry

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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what did the jew get for christmas? nothing Jewish people don't celebrate christmas

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Whats a never ending Opium for the stupid, mentally depraved un educated population? Christianity

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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HOLY COW!

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What is an antijoke? Not Knock

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Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

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okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

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Why does the girl continue to cry repetently everyday? Because she found out she was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

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Don't worry about giving me your phone number, I'll just follow you home later.

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Q - What's the difference between a Park Bench and a Black Man ? A - The Park Bench can support a family.

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Knock knock Who's there? Justin Bieber OH MY GOD REALLY?! No.

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Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A:Because it wa dead!!!!!!

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OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

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What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

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What goes round and knocks on windows? A paedophile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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