What do you give the person who has everything? A 20$ gift voucher

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a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

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The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

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What did the man say to his friend? Hello.

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Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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An Asian walks into a bar and says, "1???????????"

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Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

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Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

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Whats the difference between a bench and a black man? A bench is an inanimate object incapable of speech, emotion, or thought process.

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what's worse than finding 8 dead babies in 1 trash can?....... 1 dead baby in 8 trash cans.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Doesn't matter. He was hit by a semi truck.

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Why did sally fall off the swings? She didn't have any arms. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally, she doesn't have any arms.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What Did The Kid With No Arms And No Legs Get For His Birthday? A Walking Stick

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Q: What did the guy say to the apple? A: suck me off

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whats the difference between boyscouts and a jew? boyscouts come back from camp.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Get out".

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

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Why are Black Guys Black? Migration and adaptation to the harsh heat of the southern Sahara Desert. DUH.

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how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

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what do you call a white man in a black neighborhood a minority

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Well, I feel that I've stepped outside my comfort zone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops