what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? we are both lawyers

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Whats worse than 20 dead babies in a garbage can? A: The smell

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What do Muslims and Jews have in common? Shared humanity.

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A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

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What is 9+10? 19

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Its a sunny day. There's a tree and a bird. What did they say to each other? --------------------------------------------------- Nothing they can't talk.

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A black man is escorted into a prison. He's the new warden, and he's been shown to his office.

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What's wrong with you? I have no idea.

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Why do gingers smell so bad? So the blind can hate them too

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What do you call two Japanese men digging through rubble? Worried family members of missing relatives due to the recent devastating tragedy in the island nation of Japan.

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A Jewish person was found dead in an alley way last night, Hitler did nothing wrong.

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Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

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Guy 1: When your Justin Beiber af. Guy 2: What Guy 1: Do you mean

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I got shot in the balls now i'm pregnant?

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I once was an adventurer like you. But then I quit.

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CAUSE IT'S ONE, TWO, THREE STRIKES YOU'RE OUT

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Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

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Roses are red Grass is green Get in the van If you know what I mean

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How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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