What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

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Q: How many Jews can u fit in a bathtub? A: Well it depends if you use their ashes.

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What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

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Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

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what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

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This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black I'm blind

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Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

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I like your words "He without an equal, also stands alone was it?"

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My friend on xbox told me about this cool clan. I went to join but I didn't like to wear the white robes

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Doctor! doctor! I feel like a bridge! That's the least of your problems you've got cancer by ndc

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

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A black man walks into a KFC, he then realizes that he is in the wrong store, and walks out.

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What's black and sits at the top of the stair case? Stephen hawking in a house fire.......

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Why did the woman cross the road? Better yet, why is she out of the kitchen

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A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

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How do you piss off a jew slash his tires

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

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Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

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hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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