what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

what's the difference between a zebra and a horse They are spelled differently

Roses are red, Violets are blue, your parents are dead they never loved you! I found this one on facebook and i just found this site and all yall got some good jokes LOL

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? El-if-iknow

A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

how do you see the difference between a ceiling and a floor? people dont walk on a ceiling

Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

What do you get when you put your dick in a potato? A guy who is into creepy sex

What is green and drives around in the desert and is not a tank? secretly a tank

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

how do you stop a black man from drowning take your foot off his head

what do you give a little girl with no arms no legs and who lives in a orfanidge for christmas?.................................... nothing because no parent wants a freak kid

What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

What did the blackman say to the whiteman???? Nothing! They both commintted suicide

Knock knock Who's there? The chicken that crossed the road

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

A man walked into a bar. Too bad he didn't see it.The man was sent to the hospital 2 hours later when a friendly elderly lady found him badly wounded on the ground.

There are two muffins in an oven. Since they are inanimate objects, they do nothing but sit there and bake until they are a golden brown color, at which point a man takes them out of the oven and eats them for breakfast.

Why didn't the boy want his dinner? Because it was a bowl of vomit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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