Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call a muslim flying an airplane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was trying to kill himself in the fastest and easiest way due to his drinking problems, which in the first place separated him him from his wife, who is fighting with him in court for custody of there only child ,Steven. He can not even pay the rent on his apartment or hold a job to pay child support..he is also in debt.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you make lady gaga cry? Give her bad romance haven't you heard this joke before......DUMBASS

thumb_up thumb_down -26

95556

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was the little girl sad? She had a grown man sexually assault her.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q: What do you call a room full of black people? A: A Social Gathering.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy, she has no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Hey i just raped you and this is crazy so delete my number and keep the baby

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What did the old person find on the internet? Porn.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did Winston Churchill cross the road? Grave robbery has become a huge problem lately in the United Kingdom.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Sammy bought 48 donuts. He ate 36. What was Sammy left with? Diabetes. Sammy was left with diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Knock Knock Who's There Me

thumb_up thumb_down -28

in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Q: Why Cant The T-Rex Clap? A: No, Its Not Because His arms are to short, Its because he's Dead You Idiot...

thumb_up thumb_down -28

a young boy once lost his mind and then his parents weeped because their son had been decapatated in a horrible motorcycle accident caused by a drunk who had just killed his wife and children and was running from the cops....

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What shoots rockets but is not classed as a deadly weapon? A toy rocket launcher, I lied about the rockets.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops