a duck walked up to a lemon aid stand and he said to the man running the stand... quack

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23 convicts were showering. One of them dropping his soap bar. The person next to him picked it up, and the one who dropped it said thanks.

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whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

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Why was the black man fired from his job? Because the company was beginning to lose sales which then resulted in job cuts.

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Suicide is never funny Unless it's a clown

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Which ballet do pigs like best? Pigs don't understand ballet, but they probably like the ones with audience participation, as they are friendly animals and enjoy interacting with humans.

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Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

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What do you call a Mexican that is jumping off a building? A suicidal jumper!

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My mom says hi ............ Jk she says hello

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Knock Knock! But nobody was home and couldn't hear it.

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What's red, black, and green all over? This is! I only wish you could see it too - the website wont let me upload a picture - but it is pretty impressive! Oh well.

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2 penguins in a tub. one looks to the other an says, "pass the bar of soap." the other looks at him.."what do you think i am, a typewriter?"

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A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The priest leaves because they don't have wine.

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Patient- Doctor! I feel like a piece of ****! Doctor- What is ****? Patient- It's four dots on the computer screen representing a curse word. Doctor- What computer screen?

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

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guess what? WHAT? Idk.

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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What is green and slow Grass.

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what is the differnce between my truck and chuck norris? i eat my own poop.

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Oh because you have Lou Gehrigs Disease

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Roses are red, The grass is greener, Every time i'm with you, I touch my wiener.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was really frogger in disguise

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops