LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHH!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

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Kinky = using a feather Perverted = using the whole chicken Weird = using chicken bones Downright disgusting = all of the above, plus a cat

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What is Godzilla's favorite sport? Nothing, Godzilla is a fictional character.

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How do you kill a beetle? Wait outside his apartment and shoot him

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Young Billy was arrested today for saying he was going to be a terrorist for Halloween.

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How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

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Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He never did because he's in KFC

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Two pen state administrators walk into a butt

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Why did Johnny fall of the Swing?? Because i hit him with a shovel

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why cant women draw perfect circles? no one can becouse it is virtually impossible

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There are 3 types of people, those that can count and those who can not.

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So, a man walks into a bar. Suddenly, the universe around him cracks, unable to sustain the weight of infinite potential punchlines. He tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

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Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

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Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with a kickline

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roses are red violets are blue i bribed a hobo to eat my poopoo

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Why did the Jews go into the shower? Because they had just finish a basketball game and they needed to freshen up.

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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What musical band do you get if you keep shouting while in the mountain? The rolling stones. What do you get if you keep shouting in a snow covered mountain top? Blizzard Entertainment.

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What happened when Chuck Norris jumped into the pool? He then got water on him, and later had to dry off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops