Obama ran for re-election in 2012. He lost because he is a horrible president. the liberal left blame his defeat on racists and propose harsh Hate-Crime punishments. America falls into disrepair.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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hello anomonous

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Why was the old man lying on the floor? He had a heart attack and died

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Wgat did the umpire say to the asian batter? Foul ricebowl!

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a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

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With all due respect, I do underestimate myself, there is not a single person I know that has not told me that, but if I wanted to, I would not even had to make the effort to have you removed, hell I had to pull favors and owe people things in order to keep you safe. I could have said the rest of you, but had I not known you, had you not been one of my co-workers back then, I would not have gone to the extremes that i did, you are beautiful, but what does that have to do with anything? Do you think that if I did not know you I would go "that one is sexy, release her?" Even if I did, I do not have authority, I work for them.

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You're welcome. On to the next house.

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Rose are red, Violets are blue Your cat is dead Turkey

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Q: What do you call a dog with metal balls and two-inch legs? A: Animatronic

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure, but the farmer must be very upset about the loss of one of his chickens.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

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whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

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q:What do you tell a deaf person? a:nothing.

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Q:What's black and white and red all over? A: An interracial couple in a car crash.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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What did the Dark Knight say to the Policeman? I'm Batman

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What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

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when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

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Hickory dickery dock, two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck 1 and the other got away with minor injuries.

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I hate it when people dont finish there sen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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