Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

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What do Tutankhamun and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead

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why did bob marley die because he did also he smoked weed he was naughty!

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How do you wake up lady gaga Set her alarm clock to an appropriate time

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A blind man walks into a bar. He had a few drinks then went home.

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That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

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What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

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How many jews does it take to change a baby's diper? I don't know my wife will do it.

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Q: Why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: What to year old WOULDN'T?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

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Chuck Norris once round-house kicked someone so hard that he broke his leg.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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What do you call a black man driving an airplane? A pilot.

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What's red white, blue and hilarious? Glasgow Rangers in administration!

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What does the fox say? "It's called a hustle, sweetheart."

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A black man, a chinese man, and a dog decide to have a race. Unfortunately, they are shot by a sniper on a roof while still in the planning stages.

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You know what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile where one's alive in the middle, and has to eat his way out.

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A whole 'nother.

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"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

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Q: If Ann has 5 apples and she gives Michael 2 apples, and then Jason comes and rapes Ann. How many apples does Ann have left? R: Who the hell cares, she needs to go to the police.

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If you die, and have 5 cents in your pocket, does the toast still land jelly side down?

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What do you get a when you cross a chocolate bar and some haribo? A disease complex characterized by persistent hyperglycemia caused by insufficient insulin production or resistance to the metabolic action of insulin. Diabetes mellitus (DM) is generally classified as insulin-dependent (IDDM, type I), non-insulin-dependent (NIDDM, type II), or secondary diabetes mellitus

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What's the difference between a volleyball and a tree? They're both volleyballs except for the tree.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops