How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel

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why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

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How do we stop world hunger? We must first ask ourselves: why don't people eat?

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If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

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Did you hear about that anthony weiner guy. He is very depressed, and your mother has cancer.

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What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

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What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

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Why did the sheriff cross the road? Cuz I told him to.

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Why was the school girl called a dork. Because a whale penis is called a dork, and she identically resembles a giant aquatic dick.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Why did the black guy go to jail? Because he committed an illegal crime.

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What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

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whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing your mum having sex

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Q: How do you drown a black guy? A: Hold his head underwater and sit on his back.

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How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

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How do you make a clown cry? Hit him with a chair then rape his children

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whos on the right track? lady gaga

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What is worse than the holocaust? DUH! A worm in MY apple!

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Tourettes Kid. Touret- FUCK SHIT!

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What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

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Q: Whats the difference between a Jew and a Boy-scout A: Boy-scouts come back from camp

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Why wasn't Kevin Love able to draw a perfect circle. Because, he just wasn't able to get the job done

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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