Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

Hey babe, do you like going to sleep without shoes on? Because most people find it more comforting to remove footwear in order to rest and relax peacefully during bedtime.

A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

Knock knock whos there Ewan Gudgeon *Shoots Himself cause cannot live with hearing tht name*

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Dont be racist be like mario he is an italian who looks like a mexican speaks english and picks up coins like a jew.

Why did Anna fall off her bike? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Anna.

What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

Want to hear an orphan joke? Knock Knock Who's there? Not the parents

i'm hard

Knock Know! Come in!

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

What did the disabled kid get for his birthday. The same as any other kid.

What do you call a black man with a Ph.D? Doctor.

I don't get it

what did the whale say when he came out of the water? BLAHHRRAHAHHAAARRRAER

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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