Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

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why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

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Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: He died on Christmas Day, before his parents could tell him they had maxed out their credit cards to take him to Disney World. His father has since relapsed into alcoholism. He knows his wife is cheating on him with another man, but understands that she needs comfort that he cannot give her.

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

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What is big, white, and heavy ? A fridge

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did you hear the one about the elephant with a screwdriver? me neither...

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Why didn't Johns book get published? He had dyslexia.

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THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

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Why did the cop hate black people? He was a racist.

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How does a Chinese person wear a contact lens? On a 45 degree angle

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Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

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What did the fat man say to the other far man Hey your fat

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A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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What hurts like hell? HELL

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what did the McDonald's cashier say to the fat man ordering a large chocolate milkshake? you want some fries with that shake?

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Why did Lisa fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock! Who's there? *Definitely not Lisa.

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem doesn't make sense Potato

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why dont i play socker because im not waering socks

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A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

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How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the light bulb and one to suck my dick.

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How do you beat Andy Murry at tennis? KILL HIM!

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Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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