A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

What is the result of a couples' feud? 96.

Why can't Lake Mossman find his penis? Because he's a fat ass, and he doesn't have any arms.

Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

Your momma's so stupid, she has a lower than average IQ!

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being the worm.

Grease is the word that you heard it's got groove it's got meaning

What do you call Charlie Sheen when he's on drugs? Charlie Sheen.

Stop making 9/11 jokes their just plane unfunny

Why did the boy get nothing from Santa on Christmas? His parents died the night before!

you know whats better than lemonade? sex

Yo Momma so fat, that she need the atlantic to take a bath!

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas a pair of shoes

What happened to the baby in the microwave. I don't know I was too busy masturbating off to it in my clown suit

why did the black man drink grape kool-aid kool-aid refreshed him after a hard days work out in the field picking cotton

What is the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes you laugh and one is just a clown.

Why can't the man get a good jod? Because he did not go to college and there for did not get a good education.

what did the thief say to the man that lost his car? i stole your car.

A 14 year old boy's mother walks into his room whilst he is naked. The boy requests for his mother to leave; so she apologizes and leaves as the whole incident was rather embarrasing.

What's black and white and read all over? Corn, I lied about everything.

Yo momma stank so bad, she might have a serious vaginal infection. You should take her to the hospital.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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