Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

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It's April Fools Day... APRIL FOOLS!!!

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knock knock whos there santa santa who .....long pause he doesnt exist now go shoot urself

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if you have 2 apples and 3 oranges in one hand, and 4 oranges and 1 apple in the other, what do you have? very large hands.

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what do you call a pie in a roll a roll and pie

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Dennis: you can make anything out of coppersulfate Austin: But copper sulfate can make things out of you

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Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car and laying on the side of the rode for 2 hours then you find out that your wife was cheating on you with her your own brouther

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"Lets begin, tell me about yourself," "ok, well first I'm a open book and..." "ok next" "why?" "I fucking hate books!"

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A moose walks into a food store. He asks the lady working there where the potatoes are. She says "go down aisle 5.'' he goes down aisle 5 and there arent any potatoes

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A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

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Josh Moran peels off his foreskin while watching gay porn.

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What did the book say to it's reader? What are you stupid? People who read can't hear!

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Why did the black man cross the road? To rape the girl on the other side.

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What's up with women with there jewlery it's there's best friend,but a black man's best friend is reames..

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Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

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What's the difference between men and women? I really can't tell anymore, there's so many goddamn transvestites.

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Q. What do you say when a baby gets hit by a car? A. Lol fail

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What's worse than the Holocaust? A worm in your apple.

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You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

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A white guy and a black guy are sitting in a bar. The white guy apologizes to the black guy for the hundreds of years of slavery endured by his people.

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Whats the differents between a red farrari and a dead baby? I dont have a red farrari in my garage;)

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-funny? women have rights -funnier? civil rights

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I just found my mum has Alzheimer's, I hope it isn't contagious cause my mum has it too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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