Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? Cooked until it reaches an internal temperature of 180 degrees Fahrenheit to lower the risk of contracting diseases such as salmonella.

What's more annoying than dyslexic jokes? Jokes were peopel spel words rong.

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm bad at poetry, ELEPHANTS!

roses are red violets are blue maskrosor are gula

What do the NRA and PETA have in common? Both are prominent interest groups from whom political candidates try to obtain votes.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

Brain fart

1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

what did god say when we made his first black person oops i acidenlty burnt it

Why couldn't Billy see the show? Because Billy is blind.

Why a frog can fly? It has magic. Why a snake can fly? It ate the magic frog. Why a eagle can fly? It has wings.

what is long, white, and used almost everywhere? there are a lot of things that fit this description, so it would be highly illogical to make a guess.

Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

What do you get when you cross Dracula and a snowman. Probably a little startled from the man's Dracula costume and a little chilly because the weather is cold enough to support a snowman.

Why is this website called anti-jokes? i don't know but it makes sense.

what did the white man call a black man that was awarded the job he applied for? He stated the man was a hard worker and deserved the job. Then he walked up to the man with a smile and congraduated him. Then he went home and commited suicide after he concluded he didnt deserve to live.

timmy has no arms knock knock whos there? NOT TIMMY!!!

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for his birthday? A bike

There's an african american, a latino, and an asian man riding in the car, whos driving? Obciously one of the three

How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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