To mama's so fat that her escape velocity in her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s

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what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? .... a broken head.

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Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

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Why can Michael Jackson no longer moonwalk? because he's dead.

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Your mother is so fat because she inherited poor genes and dietary habits from her own parents.

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There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

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No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

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Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

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Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

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Patient: Doctor, it hurts when I run, I might have arthritis. Doctor: Let me check.... 5 minutes later... Doctor: It turs out you have 3 bullets in your legs. Patient: Ohhh, I get it now.

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

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what did god say when we made his first nigga oops i acidenlty burnt it

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Yo mama so fat, that she's even bigger than the universe!

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven beat and raped Six when he was child multiple times, and Seven threatened to kill Six if he told anyone.

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What did the speech impaired man say ? Nothing.

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why did the plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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What is black and white and red all over? I don't know. I was hoping you did.

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Who's mean and white and really not nice? Hitler

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A: How do you piss off a female pilot? Q: Kill her family

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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What is six foot three, plays basketball, and is black? A black dog with basketball skills and takes steroids.

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Why didnt the boy go to school the next day? Because he killed himself due to bullying

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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