A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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Q: What was the proctologist doing on the street? A: He was observing the assfault.

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Q: What do you get when you get a bunch of people who confuse dark humor for anti humor? A: This website.

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I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the rest of te people in his car.

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A woman walked into a college.....which wasn't suprising because she never learned to read

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Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

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This week only, 2 for 1 misdemeanor shop lifting arrest. How can I do it? Because I can.

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Your mother is so fat that she has a very big butt and large breasts, which is quite attractive to some men, especially if they are open-minded.

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A: How do you piss off a female pilot? Q: Kill her family

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teacher:humpty dumpty sat on a wall.... me: wait, why was he up there ms.park? teacher: well hes never been the same since vietnam, his wife divorced him and now hes a raging alcoholic.

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Q. What do you get when you mix eggs, mashed potatoes and salt? A. A pretty good batter for mashed potato pancakes.

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trump and hillary are both stranded on an island, who survives? america

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Why do girls swim naked in lakes and oceans? so they have an excuse why their pussies smell like either tuna or cat fish.

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I rode in to town on an ass... ur momas ass!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape a duck

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Do you know what killed the cat? Feline AIDS

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A boy is diagnosed with terminal cancer. His family prays for him and he still dies.

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What do you call a black man on the moon - A Problem What do you call 5 black men on the moon - A Bigger Problem What do you call every black person on the moon - Problem Solved!

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roses are red violets are blue i smell meth abkfjbekfhbkfsdshjfbkhb

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lol i'm going to hell for laughing at this shit

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Wife: Where were you all night. Husband: Cheating on you with your sister

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A Mexican, a Chinese man, and a cowboy are on a plane. The plane is crashing, and they need to get rid of anything to make the plane lighter so thet can glide to safety. The cowboy throws out all of his boots and says we have to many of these. Then the Mexican throws out all of his taco shells and says we have to many of these. Then the Chinese man throws out the Mexican and says we have to many of these.(:

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Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

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How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? None. Babies shouldn't be changing light bulbs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops