What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A. Treadmil

Knock knock. Who's there? Silence. Silence who? No, I meant there was silence, I didn't really say anything. Oh, OK. But seriously, who's there?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the farmer that was trying to kill it.

whats the same about a red crayon and a blue crayon? there both the same color except for the blue one

All the planets are named after gods Ours is named after dirt....

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

Why did the man with seasonal allergies not take his medication? He had liver disease...read the fine print

why did the plant eat a banana? it was hungry

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy, was he? No, because he had cancer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a bus.

Why was the blonde fired from the factory? Repeated absences and violation of company policy.

Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down

Why was it raining lobsters? Because they ran out of men. Why did the basketball player miss the net? Because he was hit by a lobster

What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

Why did the elephant cross the road? To get to the other side.

Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

What is the difference between a blond and a mummy? A blond has a brain.

WHY WAS 6 AFRAID OF 7? I REALLY DONT KNOW!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

What does a frog in a blender sound like? *WWWRRRRRRRBFFFFZZZZZCHWEEERRRRRR*

What did the priest say to the young boy? Hi.

What do you get when you have 5 Russians, a few 8 year olds, and guns? A kidnapping

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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