The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

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Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Orange! -door opens- You fucking come over here selling oranges one more time Julio and I will have you deported.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

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Why was the girl running? She had to catch her bus.

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Q:what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? A:get in the batmobile

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What did the woman get for Christmas? Cooking oil and a black eye.

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why are you reading these jokes? i have nothing else to do. ok

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Q.what semtemce is a most used lie by a fourteen year old? A. Yes i agree to the terms of service, and am above the age eighteen.

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Why doesnt a chicken wear pants? Because its pecker is on his head.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

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What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

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What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

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So there is this moose and he goes to a grocery store and asks, "where are the potatoes?" the employee says "aisle 5" and when the moose checks in aisle five, there are no potatoes.

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Q: How many Jews are there in Germany? A: None, they all died in the holocaust

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AND THE GAME BEGINS ANEW!

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In space, no one can hear you scream. Which means Xenomorphs are deaf.

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How will the world end? That information is unknown

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Why do bears go to school on Sunday's? They don't, bears don't go to school.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops