Yo momma's so fat she weighs more than the average woman of her age and height

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, He gave me AIDS, And I gave them to you!

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An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Anonymous. Anonymous who? Exactly.

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There is a black guy a white guy and a Mexican, whose driving. The other black guy.

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What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

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Q-What's the good thing about dating a girl volleyball player? A- She's a Girl

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What are the biggest ants in the world? Ants under a magnifying glass.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a blind-deaf-mute.

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A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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What did the mother say to her color blind son when he was about to take his first car ride alone after he got his license? Good luck

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

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What happens when you turn 70? You have to go into your settings and make the text in your phone larger just so you can read it. What happens when you turn 71? You still have to go into your settings and make the text in your phone larger just so you can read it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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What happened to George's pet rock? It ran away.

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A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

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What did Ann Frank say when she dropped her icecream Nothing because she was captured by Natzis

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Two guys walk into a bar, have a good time, and exit the bar, relatively sober. They are driven home by a friend who agreed to be the designated drive for safety purposes and enjoy the rest of the evening with their wives, to whom they are happily married. Then the joke ends abruptly.

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"I never want to see you again!" shouted Stevie Wonder to the genie in the bottle, as a young boy.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? they can SHOOT, STEAL and RUN.

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Hickory Dickory Dock Three mice ran up a clock The cluck struck one But the two other got away with minor injuries

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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