What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Hi, Steve!

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

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What is a black person's favorite food? It varies from person to person, just as with any race.

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why did the man pee in public? ... he couldnt hold it in.

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Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

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what do you call a redneck virgin? a seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

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Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

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My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

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Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

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Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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I was flying in the sky but lost control and crashed. I woke up on the floor.

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Whats the difference between 10 dead babies and 8 dead babies? 2 dead babies.

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Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Find a half-worm.

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

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A guy is at a party and he's really thirsty, so he goes to get a drink. He goes to get some soda, but the line is too long. He goes to get some water, but the line is also too long. He goes to get some punch, and it turns out there's no punch line.

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You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

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knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

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Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank! That's a felony. ;)

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Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

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You know, people are kind of like trees, they tend to fall over when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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