Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding the holocaust? A worm

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Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? A: Because she is a fictional character.

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Why do all black people have AIDS? Because they deserve it.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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How did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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Why did the computer crash? Because it had too much alcohol.

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Q: What do you call a blonde that just bought a new car? A: Carol

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

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Knock knock Come in

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a man walks into a bad part of town he is shot 13 times and dies.

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Why did the hooker cross the road? Because was a prostitute

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So, a boy walks into a baker's shop and asks for a loaf of bread. The man says "do you want white or brown?" The boy says "oh, I don't mind, I've got my bike outside."

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

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What happened to the guy that got shot? He fell down

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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Funeral... You can't spell it without FUN

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i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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Dwarf Shortage

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? I could explain officer. You see, I was jogging and I was looking for my dog and she went on to me and I told her to stop but she wouldn't listen. I'm innocent I tell you! Innocent!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops