what do you get when you cross a turkey with a goat? nothing you can't cross to genetically different spieces stupid

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You dork, seriously, the comment where I mentioned that I am married is like 60000 comments PAGES behind. What? Now you ashamed of losing your, I mean I can say that I am your first right? That I am going to stick my MANFLESH into your CHERRY AND POP IT RIGHT? JUST TRYING TO BE SUBTLE HERE! Seriously though, Your name is really Tifa? And you look a FUCKING HELL A LOT Like Tifa From Final Fantasy... You know, except she has gigantic feet and no lips and you know...

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Why did the black man wash his feet? PHOIT!!!! He washed his feet in a bird bath... Too bad his car got thrown off a cliff by a bald eagle with no feathers?

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What does the kitty say to his owner? you've CAT to KITTEN right MEOW

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? To get to the other side!

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I got put through anger management when I was a child it made me mad.

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Why was New Zealand attacked by Australia? New Zealand attacked Australia due to a teritorial dispute. The war lasted for 3 years with over 150000 deaths.

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Women's rights

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What did the retarded guy say to the other retarded guy? Youre Retarded

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What happens when you shoot someone? They die.

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What happened when the Arabic man went through airport security? He was racially profiled and stopped, delaying not only him but the line of people behind him.

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Why can't Lake Mossman find his penis? Because he's a fat ass, and he doesn't have any arms.

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Why should you be concerned if you see a black midget with no arms and no legs falling off a building? He might get hurt.

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If your reading this you will realize that this sentence means nothing and I have just taken 5 seconds of your life that you'll never get back.

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Hey are you sleepy? Good, cause I just saw Jeff The Killer and Slenderman outside your window. Good night!

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Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

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Did you hear the one about the guy who couldnt find his shoes? No? ok ill talk to someone who will get the reference

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!

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What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Cheese on toes

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Sometimes i like to paint myself red and then curl up into a ball and pretend i'm a tomato.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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