A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

Wha....You probably shouldnt read the rest of this because i lie a lot (This joke deserves lots of thumbs and comments!)

Why couldn't Helen Keller Drive? Because she was a woman.

Q: What happens when the Hydro goes out? A: The Hydro goes out.

Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

What do you call someone who doesn't have a soul? A ginger

Nero? You are alive? Holy shit! You are like so my hero! I love you man! I was so saddened to hear you where tortured and killed, but then I read about this "Axel Knight" and hoped it was you, it sure sounded like you! Please tell me its no joke, you are a hero around these parts, and we really miss you, honestly sir, is it true point zero has become some sort of utopia or are the painkillers making you a bit Hazy? I am Erica by the way, still with the order, but what is this about your empire?

one stop shop

Yo momma so fat, when she runs she makes the cd played skip, at the radio station!!!

what's worse than finding 8 dead babies in 1 trash can?....... 1 dead baby in 8 trash cans.

Q: What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? A: Not struggling with a debilitating mental or physical handicap.

Why was the Mexican running? He was being chased by border patrol!

Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

Whats worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

how do you kill a man? slowly saw off all their limbs and then jump up and down on the torso and let all the organs fly out

What did the mexican do after he finished his taco? He was eaten by a dinosaur.

What's the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? An elevator helps society

Your momma is so fat when she heard about the quater pounder she thought it was for a quarter.

What happened when the car hit the man? He died.

Why wasn't Susie happy? because she was raped by her grandfather.

Why did the african kid die He was mauled by a tiger in a zoo

Want to hear a Joke? No.

Why aren't dragons real? Because if any animal were to breath fire (let alone have a gland that produced it), they would cease to live for their necks would scorch from the inside out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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