There once was a man from Nantucket. He got AIDS and died.

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Q Whats Yellow, Has a body, And has a Spiky head ? A a pineapple

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"My CiOCK is bigger!" "No! My CiOCK is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger DiICK.

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What starts with f and ends in u-c-k? a:****

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What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

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Why do children go to school? Because they have to learn.

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Why did the shark attack the rock? Because it thought it was a human.

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident

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A Jew, an Irishman and a Russian walk into the bar and the bartender says, "Get the Hell out."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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why did the little girl fall off the swing? she was a double amputee.

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What do you do if you find blood in your poo? Stop stabbing yourself in the arse with a fork on wednesdays...

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Your mother is so fat that I suggest she should pay a visit to the nutritionist so they can work out a dieting plan together to prevent weight-related heart problems in the near future.

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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Terminator XXXIVXXX Regensisysydioniosis. Watch as the terminators return in this year`s summer blockbuster, they return to a time before the birth of Connors grandfather and manage to destroy the world, then the only decision left is for humanity in another timeline to travel back as the terminators are destroyed, but they travel back again so that! But that wont happen before Terminator: Los Pollos Hermanos.

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Why is my penis 2 inch hard? Because I rape little boys with it and there tight little asshole are crushing it

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What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tragedy.

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

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How do you kill a deer? You don't, you just let it be because that's what a decent human being would do.

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I like my coffee like i like my women ... With big titys

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A man walks into a bar. Realizing he forgot his ID, he leaves.

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Knock Knock Whos there Me Oh, come in

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Incidentally,on the subject of friends, when do you actually classify someone as a friend? Is it: When you have been to each others' house; When you have had an intelligent conversation more than once; When you have stayed for dinner; Or perhaps simply when each has decided that the other is worth the air that they breathe? [L]

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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