How do you make a girl scout cry? Kill her family.

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A man walks into a bar and is shot in the face

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Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

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You know what's sad and Funny? When a guy walks into a gay bar and doesn't get hit on.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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What is pink, red and silver and crawls into walls? A baby with forks in it's eyes

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you see theres this guy.

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Knock knock Who's there Orange and Banana Orange and Banana who? ... The man opened the door and saw a bowl of oranges and bananas.

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Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

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Why am I writing this? Cuz I am eating babies alive right now!

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when choosing a bedtime story.... jack the rippers life stories is not a good idea... ........................................................................

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What? Huh?

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Whats worse than finding an actual joke on anti-jokes? A.I.D.S.

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Skinny guy: Hey wanna hear a yo mama joke? Fat mother: Hey you wanna die?

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When life gives you lemons, you go to a therapist and seek help because your dementia has progressed to the point that you are seeing and feeling illusions.

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What the librarian say to the man? Hi, can I help you?

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every time I stay in the water too long my pp gets all shriverly sometimes can't find it omg that's so weird

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How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

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Why was the asian bad at sex? Because he was 5 years old

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Knock know! Who's there? Aids! Aids who? Aids! Aids who? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I'm not aids!

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Why do cows say moo? Because it's a cow

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What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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What's 2+2? Fish

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Roses are car Violets are giraffe this poem makes no sense microwave

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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