I haven't left my basement in 29 years

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

Once upon a time there was a man sleeping, Then he woke up.

what did the ox say to his son when he left for collage? bison

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

What is the difference between Barack Obama and Simba from the Lion King? One is a cartoon character from a beloved Disney classic and the other is the current President of the United States of America.

Why is Satan evil? Because he makes people eat apples.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

A blond, a brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They all die of starvation.

An asian woman was driving along the freeway one day when a police officer pulled her over and arrested her, The officer arrested her because she had killed her husband 5 years ago and she thought she had gotten away with it.

What's worse than someone posting a number on antijoke ? Someone posting about what's worse than the holocaust

What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken.

Whats brown and sticky? - A brown stick.

What's long, hard, and has come in it? A long, hardcovered book.

What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

Why did the young girl fall off her bike? Because somebody threw a fridge at her.

What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

What is "race car" spelled backwards? rac ecar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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