whats worst then geting a used condom put in your mouth geting wraped by mario then lugi

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock Knock Who's there? UPS you have a package from Amazon. \ Oh, Thanks, where do I sign? Right here. Ok, thanks, have a nice day. Thanks you too.

thumb_up thumb_down

My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down

Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

thumb_up thumb_down

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

thumb_up thumb_down

In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

thumb_up thumb_down

why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

thumb_up thumb_down

You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

thumb_up thumb_down

whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call two Japanese men digging through rubble? Worried family members of missing relatives due to the recent devastating tragedy in the island nation of Japan.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the scarecrow get promoted? He was outstanding in his field

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar. And has a beer.

thumb_up thumb_down

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOBSSSSSSSS!

thumb_up thumb_down

There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red, violets are blue, I got Alzheimer's! ...... Who the hell are you?

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are black Violets are Black I'm Hellen Keller

thumb_up thumb_down

Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

thumb_up thumb_down

Rex Ryans foot fetish was honer by Mark Sanchez when he threw the ball at his teammates feet.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? Can I have fries with that?

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats the difference between an american and a arab? Their Ethnicity.

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poetry Show me your titties

thumb_up thumb_down

Have you heard the one about the Priest, the Pastor, and the Mail Man? -no, how's that go? Oh you haven't? That's too bad, it's really good.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops