What do you call most people over 50 who aren't married. Divorced

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why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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How do you hurt a clown? shoot it.

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Whats worse than anal sex Anal sex with razor blades

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

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why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

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Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme The end

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

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Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

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10% of car thieves are left-handed. 80% of chimpanzees are left-handed. Therefore, if your car is stolen, there's an 8% chance a chimpanzee is responsible.

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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Why did chuck norris die Brain tumor

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Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

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What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops