Three men walk into a bar. Something happens not at relating to them.

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your mum

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What did the sleepy man say to his wife? I'm sleepy.

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Why wasn't the black kid allowed in the school? Because it was the Southern United States in the 1930s and due to racial tensions at the time most public facilities were seperated by race.

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Whats the difference between 2 white men? They both have different jobs and one is racist orange peel.

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What is similar between a dog and a cat? They are both dogs except for the cat.

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What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas?? Nobody knows because he had no arms, therefore he could not open any presents.

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Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

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What happens when a blind man walking crashes in to man that's talking to his gang ? He wakes up in a ditch

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Q:Why are dinosaurs extinct? A:Well there are two reasons the first being a giant meteor struck the earth killing all the dinosaurs. The other reason you touch yourself at night.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his mother at the hospital who is dying of cancer.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

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So a horse walks into a barn.

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I am pleased and honored to hear you speak that beautifully straight from your heart Nero, you are without equal, unmatched. And he who is unmatched, also stands alone.

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"hey do you know the date" "58"

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Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

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Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

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Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

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what do call a purple animal that eats rocks? A purple rock eater..

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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A Priest, A Rabbi, and an Imam walk into a bar. They promptly sit down and have a friendly theological discussion.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? The horse fell in the mud

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Q: Whats the difference between a trash can full of dead babies, and a porch? A: A porch isnt in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops