How do you piss off a jew slash his tires

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What do you get from M&M bags? M&Ms.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whose. There? Not Susie.

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9/11

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What's worse than Bogans? Boat people.

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How do you turn a piece of meat into a vegetable Break her neck

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One asks the other "Isn't it hot in here?" To which the other replies, "Holy ****, a talking muffin!"

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caoimhin you satan of CHRIST IM A DICIPLE OF CHRIST UNLIKE YOU

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What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

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Why'd the squrille fall out of the Tree? Cause it was dead

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What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

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Sex

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

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How many moose does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it is biologically and theoretically impossible for a moose to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

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what type of cat has green feathers? a green-feathered cat.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Knock Knock Knock" "Knock knock Knock who?" "Just let me in, you twat, it's freezing out here!"

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Why was the black man running? Because he was playing capture the flag.

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Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

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there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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