Robert Mugabe.

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PENIS :)

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A white guy, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a Hispanic guy walks into a bar. The white guy orders a beer, the black guy orders a shot of vodka, the Asian guy orders a sake, and the Hispanic guy orders a shot of tequila. They were drinking and having a great time.

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Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally! How did Sally die? She couldn't figure out how to open the fridge

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What's as hard as a rock? A rock

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Q. Why did the boy fall off the swing? A. He had no arms or legs. Q. What did he get for Christmas? A. A drumset Q. Knock Knock Who's there Not him

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Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Actually, violets are violet

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What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

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Q: What's worse than your parents dying in a car crash? A: You were in the backseat and saw your mother plead your father to slit her throat witht he broken glass because her legs were brushed and a windshield wiper was shoved in her kidney. As you stared on in pure horror, your father did as she asked with much contemplation. An ambulance arrives moments later. In the hospital, you tell your dad that you hate him for killing mom. You run away and he dies overnight due to heart failure. Yo suffered paralysis and now and are confined to a wheelchair for the rest of your natural life and are sent away to a born-again foster care home where you are never adopted.

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A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

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So, a man walks into a bar. Suddenly, the universe around him cracks, unable to sustain the weight of infinite potential punchlines. He tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

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I would tell you a joke about a broken pencil, but it's pointless.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, Some don't.

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A Black man is running down the street with a T.V. He just bought it with the money he is getting from his recent promotion to partner at a local Law firm. He is running because he had to park far away and wanted to get out of the rain.

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'I had a surprise test today.' 'What happened?' 'I was really surprised.'

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

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Q: What's black and white and rape kids? A: Pandas, I lied about the rape.

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Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

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Q : WHAT DID THE SMALL SHEEP SAY TO THE BIG SHEEP ? Z : BÆÆÆ

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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What does a shortstop do when the ball is by third base? He leaves the field to go to the hospital, his little sister just had a heart attack.

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Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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