A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde go on vacation in Hawaii. They plan to swim to the next island. The brunette and redhead do it with no problem. The blonde swims halfway and realizes she is tired. She continues to swim straight ahead knowing her friends are already at the next island.

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What do a vampire and a ginger have in common they're both afraid of the sunligh- oh wait this anti jokes ohhhhhhh oh well

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There is a wizard standing on a street corner. A boy walks up to the wizard and says, "Can you turn invisible?" The wizard replies, "Oh, I'm not a wizard. I'm a hobo with a long beard and a bathrobe." The hobo then proceeded to begging the boy for money.

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What did one muffin say to the other Muffin? Nothing, muffins have no method of communication in any way shape or form

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A man and his young child walk into a clinic to get physical check-up. The man learns from the physicist he doesn't mater. His wife remarries and start having frequent sex and the child is scarred for life. This is irrelevant because both parents don't exist and this is all a constant delusion in an psychiatric hospital.

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What's the best Anti-Joke ever? I don't know, but it's NOT this one.

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Dylan Hodge's mother touches her own butthole at night. Joshua Brown's sister rubs Josh's earlobes passionately. Brock is a fag. Jacob is Awesome. Daniel THINKS he's awesome. Jamie kills everyone. Apart from Jacob.

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A panda walks into a bar and orders a beer and a hamburger. After he eats he stands up stretches and pulls out a gun shooting everyone in the room but the bartender. The panda puts $20 on the bar and turns to leave. As he walks out the door the bartender asks why the panda shot everyone. The panda tells him to look in the encyclopedia. The bartender looks up panda and he reads: "A rare bearlike mammal (Ailuropoda melanoleuca) of the mountains of China and Tibet, having woolly fur with distinctive black and white markings. Also called giant panda, panda bear." Seeing absolutely nothing in this description that would rationalize the homicides the panda had just committed, the bartender arrived at the reasonable conclusion that the panda was psychotic and having severe psychological problems which probably caused the incident. The bartender couldn't help but wonder if this tragedy could've been avoided had the panda been properly screened for schizophrenia and guns been properly secured in a safe at the panda's mother's house.

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"What's funnier then this joke? Women's rights." *Your suggestion is contradictory considering the fact that you are implying "Women's rights" is more humorous than "Women's rights".

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how do you fit 100 jews in a mini ? two in the front, two in theback and 96 in the ash tray

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Why didn't Suzie ride her bike? Suzie's mother aborded her. She was never born.

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"This is Jesus Christ to Tim Tebow. Please leave me alone. Don't you know that my day off, is Sunday?"

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So there is this moose and he goes to a grocery store and asks, "where are the potatoes?" the employee says "aisle 5" and when the moose checks in aisle five, there are no potatoes.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was in the oven because the farmer was cooking it for dinner.

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What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

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Why was Billy lat to school? He was being raped.

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Q: what did Timmy get for his 8th birthday A: killed MR

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm allergic to both Now I'm dead

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Why do black people make the best milkshakes? because they use the finest ingredients

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What Did The Farmer Say When He Lost His Tractor.... "Wheres My Tractor"

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noah is a scrub jungle

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Equal rights!

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A monkfish walks into a bar... The world blew up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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