Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

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Justin Beiber

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there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

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What do you call someone who kills a black person? A cop

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What did the transvestite say to the hypochondriac? "Ever been to Toledo?"

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Knock knock Whos there An axe murderer oh sweet come on in.... dinners on the stove and i am here all alone

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The fact that you actually took time to read this cynically hypnotizing answer that you cannot seem to stop reading even though you know that this sentence is just a clever run to show the epitomy of the anti joke. ha-ha.

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The young orphan boy had high hopes for this Christmas. When he woke up, he ran to the foot of the tree and saw a large box wrapped with seasonal wrapping paper. He looked at it to see that it was for someone else. The boy recieved nothing for Christmas and was later hit by a bus that had veered off of the road to avoid hitting a dog. The boy is now paralyzed and is extremely disappointed as to how his Christmas had unfolded.

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When time is the best time to make a wish during the day? 9:11

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ADAM FANTUZZI SUCKS KIRANS BALL SACK

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Cry me a river. Then build a bridge and become a structural engineer.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "I'm going to kill everyone you've ever loved you fucking cocksucker, you think you can get away with sleeping with my wife? You better think again kiddo I will take away everything from you until you are reduced to a smoldering ruin of what you once was, mark my words bitch."

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Ask me what my name is. What's your name. My name is Jeff.

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how do you wake up lady gaga? set her alarm for a reasonable hour

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

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Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, I am Colorblind...FML

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I once saw a small Italian man wearing trainers with a smart suit. He looked like an idiot, but I considered the option that he may not have had any money left after buying the suit to buy shoes. Exercising diplomacy, I left him be and enjoyed a nice meal with he and his trainers.

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What did the Priest say to the kid walking home alone? Be safe.

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Why Did The Black Man Cry? KFC Went Bankrupt!

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EVERYONE NEEDS TO UNDERSTAND!! DYSLEXICS ARE TEOPLE POO!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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