- Anti Joke

A man was standing out in the rain and calls out to god saying "smite me god, SMITE ME NOW" and the man was arrested and booked cause a near by neighbor reported on the disturbance. he is now facing charges of disturbing the peace.

It's yellow and you'll die when it comes into your eye. A taxi.

What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is an object and the black man is a human being.

What's the difference between a jew and pizza? A Jew is human and pizza is food.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom

Q #1: Why did Sally fall off the swings? A #1: She has no arms. Q #2: Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally.

What has a black, blue, and red all over? Timmy. He was mugged, and vigorously raped.

What happens when you mix mints with fizzy drinks Blast off

gingers

Your mom goes to college. Actually, she graduated a while back!

Yo Mama's so fat that she is at risk for diabetes

Why was the Pædophile arrested? He hit his wife.

why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

Boy it's sure cold out today. Die

What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What's the difference in a big brother and a wee brother? Ones big, ones small.

A horse walks into a bar. Just kidding, it's a panda.

I'm HIV positive.

What did hitler do with the vegetarians? Nothing, because he was one.

Roses are red Violets are blue Most rhymes rhyme But this one doesnt

Q: Knock Knock!?! A: Lettem' in!!!!

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

What did one penguin-necrophiliac say to another penguin-necrophiliac? Nothing. Penguins cant talk.

Whats big orange and likes to eat rocks? a big orange rock eater