Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed all of six's family

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are red, violets are blue, if you had a pulmonary embolism, you would be too

thumb_up thumb_down -15

CAOIMHIN. IVE BEEN DOING MY WORK SINCE IVE STARTED THIS CLASS. YOU'VE STARTED THIS WHOLE THING. I WROTE BIG MAC'S AND THATS IT. SO STFU

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what do you call 3 mexicans in the back of a car? Carpooling to work to save on gas.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do a fish and an eagle have in common? They both live underwater aside from the eagle.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Aodhans da is Mr.Bradly and he dosnt know what coordinates are, 180 anti-clockwise,he has "the key to examination success is revision and homestudy tattooed on his chest, his das herbert the pervert, his mas a taxcollector and on the dole, his da sits on the roof eating biscuits, cleaning the satilite dish, he gets his pubes shaved in gordans chemist, he uses mcdonaldsd wifi, hes a fruit fly and he can stop global warming by shaking his head!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

there square amphibious wood gum flag homos CC

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's worse then running out of toilet paper? Getting shot

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Two pandas walked into a bar. The bar was in china.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I told him to. I'm very influential.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Opinions are like assholes. I'm not sure how they are alike, but that seems to be the general consensus.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a blind person? Mack Despard

thumb_up thumb_down -15

8=> >->-o

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why was the kid late for his dentist appointment? He was abducted and he's been missing for thirteen days

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man walks into a bar... "OUCH", he says for no apparent reason. He then buys a beer.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are red, Violets are blue, So what is the colour violet for?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q. What did the mockingbird say to the blue jay? A. I mock you by mocking you

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you make Jacob cry? Take away his xbox

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a Fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops